God’s Timeline, Not Mine

​Growing up I always wanted to be a mom. I can remember playing “house” with my friends and always being the mom. I loved playing with baby dolls and helping take care of my baby cousins.

I always knew I was going to be a mom; I had my whole life mapped out. You know what I’m talking about: married at 22, house by 23, kid one at 24, etc... one big happy family, but God had other plans.

Isn’t that how it always goes? We all want our lives to look a certain way, yet God is there asking us to trust Him and His plans. 

As for me, I fought God hard for a while. I was in a serious relationship that I thought was amazing but from the outside everyone could see how toxic it was. I was adamant about my dreams to the point of blindness. I was not trusting God; I was trying to forge my own, “better” path. Looking back now, I see what everyone else saw. The fighting, the jealousy, the control— that was not love. That was not the person God had for me.

My 22nd birthday came and went, and I was no closer to being a mom; I saw my dreams moving farther and farther away from me and I was upset with God. Like Joseph, in this week’s reading, I waited. Unlike Joseph, I struggled to trust God’s plan. Joseph was locked in a dungeon for two years, yet he did not lose faith in God’s plan for him.

Proverbs 3:5 says, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.” Easier said than done, right? It’s hard to trust in a plan you cannot see, until you realize it’s in the hands of a perfect, loving God.

Thankfully, even when we struggle to trust, God is still working out His perfect plan for us.

I waited two more years for the man God had for me. My road to motherhood was not easy, either. It was met with hardship and sadness, but God knew exactly when we would need our son. He knew that 2020 would be a tough year, and he provided us with a bright spot— our son was born in the middle of a pandemic. We may not have gotten the pregnancy or birth we imagined, but we did get our beautiful son and we thank God for him every day. Like Joseph, we trusted in God; we leaned into God and learned that His timing is perfect, and His ways are good.

Joseph’s undying trust in God’s plan saved an entire nation. Imagine if he had chosen to give up on God’s plan and make his own way.

It is hard to keep that faith when the enemy is trying to pull us down, but learning scripture and speaking it over our situations is one way we can fight doubt. When I am struggling to trust, I think about Proverbs 3:5, and remember that God is completely trustworthy. Think of a Bible verse that reminds you to trust in God and put it up on your bathroom mirror, your phone, or on the fridge. Seeing that verse when you face trials, will help you remember how perfect God’s timing actually is.

​More perfect than our own timing.

Memory Verse: ​“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” Proverbs 3:5-6 NIV

About the Author

Hi! I'm Courtney Filippin, I have been married for two years to my husband, Brian and we are first time parents to a sweet baby, Oliver. We currently live in Illinois but are hoping of moving down south in the near future. As a first time mom, I love helping, encouraging and supporting other moms no matter where they are in their journey with Christ. I loved reading a good book with a nice hot cup of coffee in the morning, but my mornings are now filled with baby snuggles and giggles and I would not trade that for anything in the world!

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