By Melissa Holmlund
“Show me your friends, and I’ll show you your future.” My husband and I heard this quote in a movie years ago, and it’s stuck with us ever since. I think about friendship often. I need friends. I need good friends, and so do you.
We were created for relationship. We were not created to be alone. We were created to feel, to communicate, to embrace, to share, and to ‘do life’ with people around us. We were not created to be loners, to be friendless, or to be isolated.
Scripture begins and ends with relationship. In the beginning God created the earth, the Spirit hovered over the waters, and when God said, “Let there be light,” He was speaking Jesus! Think about that! Trinity. God exists in relationship, and He made us for relationships - relationship with Him and with others. And, at the end of this age, Jesus will come for His bride, the church, and we will worship the Lord together, for all of eternity.
My husband is my best friend. Eric knows me better than anyone else knows me, and I know him better than anyone else knows him. I share most everything with Eric; struggles, joys, laughter, hurts, fears, accomplishments, insecurities, and victories. He’s safe. I’m safe. Though marriage isn’t always easy, we love each other and are committed to each other. However, as sweet as our relationship is, it isn’t enough.
The past couple of weeks have been challenging. I could give you a list of everything that has gone on, all the good stuff, all of the bad stuff, but I won’t. I’ll just tell you that multiple times I felt like quitting. I felt overwhelmed, exhausted, disorganized, taken for granted, and hormonal.
My house was a mess. By a mess I mean a total mess. My bedroom had piles of clothes from a recent trip still on my floor waiting to be put away a week after our return. I don’t want to even talk about the toilets or my fridge, or our big white van…I felt myself sink into the familiar pit of despair.
Then…I had a meltdown. Not pretty. I cried and I screamed. (Yes, I screamed.) I was not okay…
So…my amazing husband took me with him while he ran errands. He let me cry in the privacy of our van. I talked to God. I asked Him for help, and then, I texted a couple of my good friends. Here’s where I get back to friendship. My husband Eric is my best friend, but sometimes I need more than Eric, I need my girl friends, and Eric needs me to have these friends.
I have some really good friends. They know me well. They know my struggles and my strengths. They rejoice with me when I am blessed, and they cry with me when I’m hurting. They speak truth to me. They pray for me. They don’t share my crud with others. They don’t laugh when I fall. They don’t get offended when I speak truth to them. They are kind. They are fun.
They are all different. My friends don’t all have six kids, nor do they all homeschool. Three of my closest friends live hundreds of miles away. They are not all thirty-six years old, and they don’t all share the same movie, music, and clothing preferences.
Like me, they’re not perfect, but they long to be like Jesus.
Proverbs 27:17 says, “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.”
When I text or call a friend for prayer, they pray. They speak Scripture or words of encouragement to me, and I find myself strengthened, and my perspective gets back on track. My friends can’t fix me or my problems, but they point me to Jesus, my husband, my family, and my purpose.
Verse of the Week:
“Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls, but has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone. Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” Ecclesiastes 4:9-12
Heavenly Father, thank you for friendship. I recognize my need for good friends, and I ask you to lead me and help me in my friendships. Help me to be the friend you want me to be. Please provide me with friends who will encourage me in my walk with you. I pray that I will have wisdom in my friendships. Show me which friendships you want me to nurture. I ask for ‘iron sharpens iron’, ‘two are better than one’ friends. Thank you for calling me your friend. Speak to me this week as I commit my friendships to you now in Jesus name.