By Kandice Adams
She asked her friends for help bathing her children.
And not just a few friends via private message, but she broadcasted her request on social media, for all to see.
She and I have never met face to face, but I can tell that she has no problem with confidence and admitting her need for help.
God used her seemingly simple request, that day, to speak to my heart, and to humble me.
Most of us women are not like her… including me.
In this moment, I am forced to be objective and agree with the guys when they say that women are a puzzle. We act like we have it all together, outwardly, even if we are crumbling inwardly… especially us mothers.
Every mom can relate to the struggles of motherhood, yet instead of asking for help, we allow ourselves to be buried under the pressures; then we point the finger at each other to take the attention off of our own shortcomings, and offering encouragement is a rarity.
We may not say it aloud, but we think it:
Where is his mother? I can’t believe she let him go outside wearing those clothes.
Can you believe her mother let her get those piercings?
Whether we would like to admit it or not, there is a competition going on. Each of us secretly striving to be the best mom, the best friend, the best anything.
This competition turns us into that girl.
You know, that girl whose envy squelches out the encouragement she should offer.
That girl who is threatened by the successes of others.
Or maybe that girl who is annoyed by the accolades of the accomplishments of others.
It’s difficult to be honest about the uglier parts of myself, like the part that somehow believes that my own talents and contributions, would be devoid of significance if someone else does something as well as I do, or perhaps even better.
This realization has caused me to pause and really consider the depth of my own insecurity. I see, now, that somewhere deep inside, I want to be the one and only who can excellently do this motherhood-crafting-anything-thing because someone better would mean: I am not enough.
Thankfully, it is when my shortcomings intersect with God’s abundance, that true understanding of His grace and my own identity in Christ emerges. It is in these moments of weakness that the Spirit speaks the truth: someone else’s excellence does not minimize my value, insight, or abilities.
God has placed each of us in this very moment in time, to carry out a specific purpose. During the creative process, there was no assembly line of clay in which He produced an abundance of one kind of woman. He made no mistake; you are uniquely made.
It is so important that we stop allowing ourselves to be that girl, and instead, step into the girl He is calling us to be. The girl whose faith in Him be overflowing, who believes not only that He can, but also that He will excellently work through her on any and every platform He has given her.
So let’s be supportive of the talents and gifts of other women (Proverbs 31:26).
So let’s be encouragers (Hebrews 3:13).
So let’s celebrate all wins for the Kingdom of God, not merely our own.
And let’s allow that girl’s excellence to propel us further.
Today, let’s stop and say it aloud. Say the words, “I am His girl. I am talented; I am unique, and no one can take away what God has placed inside of me.” Then take a moment to stop and encourage someone else who may need it today.
Word of the Day:
"As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God’s varied grace." 1 Peter 4:10 (ESV)
Father, I want to do the best at what you have called me to do but sometimes I feel threatened by the talents and gifts you have placed in others. In those moments when I get caught up in myself and in my own insecurities, help me to focus on you. Remind me that you have made no mistake, and their excellence does not minimize my existence. In Jesus’ name, amen.