My boys, ages 5 and 6, have reached an age where “boyfriends and girlfriends” are suddenly the talk of the town.
It’s hilarious to hear them talking in the backseat of the car, trying to sort out whether they, too, will have a girlfriend one day, and what exactly it means to be “married.”
Like most little boys, my oldest is convinced that he and I are destined to be married some day, and as far as I’m concerned, he can just keep on believing that.
All of this crazy talk has heightened my realization that time is snowballing towards that day when, donned in tuxedo, my boys will wait for their own bride to walk that petal-coated aisle.
What will she be like? As most parents, I love my child and desire the very best for him not just for now, but when he leaves the nest too.
It’s been talked about for years: boys are drawn to girls who are like their mother (or female influence in their life); girls are attracted to boys who are like their father (or male influence in their life).
I’ve concluded that if I want to lead my boys to choose a woman who will enrich their life, not tear it down, I must be the example.
How high am I setting the bar--
Am I modeling modesty?
Do I treat my husband, and men in general, respectfully?
Do I serve joyfully?
Do I love others and extend a helping hand whenever possible?
Ladies, these are some tough questions.
But perhaps the toughest of them all: Would I want my son to marry me?
Phew. It can difficult to look in the mirror sometimes.
Proverbs 31 contains the words of advice taught to King Lemuel by his mom. In it, she lovingly sets the precedent of a good wife for her son. Verse 11 says, “Her husband can trust her, and she will greatly enrich his life.”
Am I enriching the life of my husband, or tearing him down?
What am I teaching my impressionable sons to look for in a future wife?
What am I modeling for my daughter?
It begins at an early age. As parents we must guide them in making good choices.
We lead by example.
Of course there are never any guarantees-- just because we point our kids down one path, doesn’t mean they won’t choose another. Ultimately the outcome is in God’s hands. Our job is to point our children in the right direction through our words and actions, pray for them, and love them.
What do we need to do to begin modeling a wife-worthy women to our children today?
Maybe it starts by removing some less-than-modest items from our closets, or with a simple apology to hubby. Or maybe we simply need to ask the Lord to help us to serve our households with gladness, instead of begrudgingly.
Let’s look in the “mirror” of God’s word and allow Him to show us some areas where we need to allow God to change us from the inside out.
Let’s seek the Lord so that He may use our lives to point the next generation in the right direction— setting them up for healthy relationships and a successful future.
Word of the Day:
“Who can find a virtuous and capable wife? She is more precious than rubies. Her husband can trust her, and she will greatly enrich his life.” Proverbs 31:10-11
Lord, Thank you for trusting me with the enormous role of leading my children by example. Help me to have a perspective shift so that I may model for them a wife-worthy woman. Empower me to take those first steps that you have directed me in. And Father I pray that you will surround my children with others who will, likewise, model godly ways. In Your name I pray, Amen.
Author: Katie Gibson